For those of us in Ottawa who like rock and roll, New Swears are probably a household name. We’ve been covering these guys from the beginning. From the days of the Fun Boy Club House, to their monsterous album release show at Gabba Hey in 2014, to many hangovers and late nights, New Swears have always been one of our favourites locally.

But who are New Swears, really?

Are they a party band? Are they no-good crust punks? Are they weekday partiers that have no regard for self-preservation? Maybe. Or Maybe not. Who are we to say?

One thing is for sure, they have something big in store this summer. Something really big. We’re in on the secret and are red in the face with excitement to let the beans spill. But until then, we’ll have to wait.

Buddy Smiles, a great friend of the band, has written a heart-felt band bio for New Swears. It’s a little unconventional, and may bring a tear to your eye. But Buddy relays the sentiments that many of us feel about this band and can’t find the words to say. New Swears has helped a lot of us feel like part of something over the years. Whether that’s a mosh pit, a basement with puke on the walls, a loving family of buds, or soaring on top of the crowd, we all have a story.

So sit back, relax, and soak in the words read by Buddy Smiles himself.

Words by Buddy Smiles

I’ve read a lot of crap about New Swears in my day. I’ve heard a lot of shallow comparisons and insincerities. Most of the time reading New Swears reviews feels like I’m reading something copy & pasted from a stock band document. Something that’s been passed down the telephone game by journalists just Mad Libbing the names and adjectives into something they can release. They are often lazily labeled as a “party band” and unfairly pigeonholed into clichés. But, some things have to be experienced and can’t be simply captured or easily explained.

There’s more depth to it.

They’ve broken through fair weather comparisons and carved out a place of their own in the boondocks of rock music. They bend genres and blend styles to create a unique package and unforgettable presentation. They go to dark parts of the human psyche and talk about the things we all think, but have a hard time communicating.

I was in my twenties and thought it was about time for me to mature. It was an age when risk-taking was far removed and playing it safe was in fashion. I often asked myself Where are you going? How are you going to get there? I was alone.

Then I found out about this band and it changed my conception of what growing up means. The original musical compositions, down to earth kin-ship, and raw production combine elements that created a synergy so unique… yet so familiar. They ignored all previously beaten paths and lead me on a journey straight through the untamed bush. They cast a stone into my placid pond and when the rippling subsided I was no longer alone.

Their chameleon-like qualities have helped them evolve with the times while staying true to the original spark. They have an ability to use dramatic subtleties and playful parody, which is rare in today’s landscape. I can’t really be sure whether they’re joking or not half the time and I often wonder if they even know themselves. But alas, the story continues.

These infamous protagonists have helped us realize that we aren’t alone in our unwanted thought cycles. Like a ball of inspiration bouncing down the hallways of our lives, picking up little bits of the human condition along the way. New swears don’t glorify the ups and downs, they just document a relatable non-biased perspective as they live it. You really want to understand New Swears? Don’t over think it. Try and enjoy yourself, it’s just a ride.

Sinisterly,

Buddy Smiles

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